On one hand I feel greatly nostalgic and longing for the past year. I keep getting random flashbacks: returning to my Chiang Mai guest house so drunk I giggle all by myself, running through our Hong Kong neighborhood park filled with elderly morning exercisers, repeating the crux move on an Yangshou project route... I have a countless amount of priceless memories! On the other hand I now enjoy having an established life with set schedules, steady income and ability to plan ahead. I have a cute home on the top of an old building, with wooden floor, leaning ceiling beams and old-style shaped windows.
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| The Hague |
I feel that I have not got any new intakes about what life means for me. Instead, I agree to a lot of what I have already written before. So I thought to reflect with some of my previous posts...
25/03/2013: Intro
"After dying, one of my biggest fears is to get stuck with current routines and neglect the feeling of boredom - I have seen this, so what next? ... I doubt that I will ever find one single thing that makes me satisfied for the rest of my life. There are way too many things to experience to keep doing any of them for too long." - Nothing to add. Not to praise myself, but I could not have said this better!
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| Tried a new thing (ice), chose to stick to the old (rock)... |
"We must have faith in ... guiding us to where we need to go. I do not mean passively waiting for things to happen but actively seeking for opportunities and staying open-minded to alternative options, confident that sooner or later they will appear ... I stream around for any seemingly interesting things that might provide me with good experiences, and try to hold enough courage to go for them!" - Towards the end of my last journey I was getting desperate at not getting a job. Yet still I would not have chosen to not to leave my old position. When my current work contract ends next year, I might be on the job search again. But that time I will have experience, knowledge and contacts, and I know I will for sure make it!
04/07/2013: Journey with music
"I decide to attempt to recognize special moments already when they are present, not just when they are past. Yet I should not desperately stick to those moments but let them pass, trusting that other ones will follow even if I have to wait for a while." - This promise is easier to fulfill when one's life is changing rapidly. Often experiencing special moments requires new situations, places and people. To be honest, I no longer want to be patient for long periods of nothing exciting happening. Life is just too short. I want to shape mine to be as special as possible, all the time!
18/04/2013: Brainstorming on decision making
"Should I end this stage of discovering development work and go back to IT business? Or should I pursue into finding more inspiring but risky career opportunities? ... What to value more, settling for achieved good or risking for potential great? For me, when is the right time to end the stage of discovery life? Ever?" - I think already back two and half years ago I knew what the final answer would be. I am happy I did it; I am now in the discovery mode and will most likely stick to it for times to come!
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| Packing yet for another trip... |
"I can be happy doing nothing. False. After relaxing for a while I want to start doing something productive to earn my living. Free time truly becomes valuable when it is balanced with scheduled responsibility." - Sure, let's take for example climbing. During my timely-free Asia journey I wasted many days near amazing crags by being too tired/scared/unmotivated to climb properly. Now that outdoors climbing is scarce for me, I appreciate every single route I get to try!
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| The weekend destination, Berdorf |
27/05/2014: Unbeaten stress
"But what is THE path? Is it destined by some higher power and made accessible to those who dare to try? Or do we entirely by ourselves make our paths, shaped just by pure luck?" - We tend to think our lives are destined because we happened to be in certain positions or met certain people, to get us to where we are now. But we fail to acknowledge that also other random happenings would have brought cool things into our lives. They may have been different but equally meaningful.
25/11/2014: Nam Pha Pay Ai
"But that is traveling; you see places and meet people for a while, and then say goodbye in order to go for yet new experiences ... I know that I will never meet again with most of these people, but I will have learnt different life lessons from them ... Then in the end, the most significant path-crossings will stay in my memories for a long time." - At the time of writing that, I could not even guess how right I was. Thinking about all the amazing people I met along the journey makes me feel incredibly blessed!
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| Reunion in Switzerland |
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| Reunion in Italy |
22/12/2014: Traveling and/or/versus working
" ... what kinds of career profiles exist that might interest me. So far my list of key words is the following: impact sector, developing countries, climate change, economic development, consulting, project management." - My current job has all that. I still cannot believe I eventually managed to get exactly what I wanted!
08/04/2015: Why I quit my job
"I must keep trusting on myself. As long as I believe that I am determined, smart and lucky enough, I will be alright ... Now I must stick through it until I find myself in a new, exciting and fulfilling job ... So when I eventually wake up one morning happily thinking about going to work, I know this struggle has paid off!" - Indeed, nowadays when my alarm goes off at 6am, I get up satisfied with the thought of quality coffee and biking to work. For the first time ever I am truly interested and motivated with what I am doing. Previously I did not even know what a difference it would make!
I have some vague plans for the future. But in today, (even though I still cannot climb even 7A, my bike got stolen and it's raining all the time), I am living my life just as I want it to be!
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