I am privileged with many freedoms. I can express my opinion, travel, vote, work, be myself. All these rights are to some extent granted to me by external factors, such as my country of birth and economic opportunities. But there is one freedom - Freedom of Mind - that is up to me to either possess or miss. One can be locked into prison for life but still remain her mental composure. Or one can be given all the success and love in the world, and yet still lack presence of mind. If freedom of mind is just a mental state, available for everyone, why is it so hard to acquire? What is it actually?
When I left for travelling, I thought I was reaching a higher state of freedom. I was seemingly immune to the expectations of society, family and myself. I convinced myself I no longer cared about financial security, opinions of others or even a sense of belonging. I often asked myself one honest question: What do you want now to be happy? If it was traveling to a new destination, I did that. If it was staying somewhere, I did that. I learned to follow my instinctive desires, deal with uncertainty and make spontaneous, open-minded decisions. Compared to who I had been before traveling, I was indeed a freer person.
However, no matter what I was doing, I was not really in control of my mind. I was always pondering about the future and possible suffering. I could be at the most beautiful spot, together with people I liked, doing what I wanted, and yet still my thoughts would be racing; What will happen next? Will I lose this all? What if my plans fail? I was not fully enjoying the moment. I could not, and I never will be able to, control the future. Unexpected things - both good and bad - will keep happening without me planning them. The only thing I can control is my mind. I can either stick to living in the present, facing each experience as it comes, or let my mind run over hundreds of future scenarios.
I think deepest suffering does not come from failing to get a dream job or from performing badly in a sport (=climbing) - even though they are also serious issues - but from being abandoned by a loved one. The pain of parting with someone special, be it due to circumstances or lack of feelings, is so strong and sharp I never want to experience it again. In the end I would really want to build a life together with someone I love, but it would require me to accept the risk of suffering again. That is why it might be easier to just enjoy my nice life without daring to even try to get something I really want. But it would not be living with freedom. Instead I would be constrained by my mind.
In my opinion, freedom of mind is being able to have goals and follow dreams without fear of future suffering. Plans may very well change or fail on the way, and one should in any case stay flexible to alternations, but not going for them at all is weakness. Suffering can be an outcome of trying and one must accept it, but not fear it beforehand. It is pointless spending so much precious now-time to worrying about the future, that anyways is uncontrollable and unpredictable.
I want to keep my mind calm, open and focused. I want to stay relaxed and live in the moment. I want to be brave and try my best.
When I left for travelling, I thought I was reaching a higher state of freedom. I was seemingly immune to the expectations of society, family and myself. I convinced myself I no longer cared about financial security, opinions of others or even a sense of belonging. I often asked myself one honest question: What do you want now to be happy? If it was traveling to a new destination, I did that. If it was staying somewhere, I did that. I learned to follow my instinctive desires, deal with uncertainty and make spontaneous, open-minded decisions. Compared to who I had been before traveling, I was indeed a freer person.
I think deepest suffering does not come from failing to get a dream job or from performing badly in a sport (=climbing) - even though they are also serious issues - but from being abandoned by a loved one. The pain of parting with someone special, be it due to circumstances or lack of feelings, is so strong and sharp I never want to experience it again. In the end I would really want to build a life together with someone I love, but it would require me to accept the risk of suffering again. That is why it might be easier to just enjoy my nice life without daring to even try to get something I really want. But it would not be living with freedom. Instead I would be constrained by my mind.
In my opinion, freedom of mind is being able to have goals and follow dreams without fear of future suffering. Plans may very well change or fail on the way, and one should in any case stay flexible to alternations, but not going for them at all is weakness. Suffering can be an outcome of trying and one must accept it, but not fear it beforehand. It is pointless spending so much precious now-time to worrying about the future, that anyways is uncontrollable and unpredictable.
I want to keep my mind calm, open and focused. I want to stay relaxed and live in the moment. I want to be brave and try my best.
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